Tuesday, 31 July 2007

Kenny Simpson

Went to watch The Simpsons Movie today in Mid Valley. It was awesome. I laughed through out the whole movie. Its like damn fun as the whole cinema really laugh at the same time and non stop.

Gonna tell you some synopsis of the movie. So you guys that are going to watch it, I advise you not to read on, just browse the pictures. This are for those who are faraway, especially Japan which most probably have to wait till next next month until they translate it into Do Simsono Movio. So the movie revolves around the Simpsons family crazy acts until Homer brought home a pig that he like so much until he built a silo to store the pig's poo. Desperate to find a place to dispose, he just settle it in the Springfield Lake and cause high radioactive and toxic pollution. Did I mention that his own crap also filled half of the silo? What a big piece of crap?

So the EPA (some environmental organisation) suggested to the President to put a large glass dome over Springfield and they will eventually wipe out Springfield from the map and the history. And definitely the whole city is furious with Homer. So what else will happen? Will they be safe in the dome? Will any of them survive? Haha you just gotta watch it yourself. But as all super hero movie, the leads will always save the day.

At the meantime, visit The Simpsons Movie website. Its pretty cool and fun. I created a character out of me. Well a typical Chinese Asian character. Wonder will I be casting for the next movie?

And then I created a cooler version. There's plenty of games there. So enjoy guys.

Monday, 30 July 2007

Hit the Aeroplane?


For those 'bananas' that can't understand Cantonese please get a translator. But the guy who doesn't do it really like one of a kind. As in like 0.001% man don't do it. Sorry to disappoint you perverts out there but hopefully I get some good stuff soon. Credits given to Kok Hong who is busy with exam yet free to find all this stuff in Japan.

Sunday, 29 July 2007

Jails Aren't Blind

Here's a Youtube video on Mika Brzezinski of MSNBC who rips the news on Paris Hilton after refusing to read the news on the newly released b**** from the prison as the headnews. Good for her, a real journalist spirit. Thanks Kevin for recommending the video.

And here's a funny video about Paris Hilton as well.

I think you guys had enough Paris Hilton for the day. But here's a site that features Paris Hilton skin-deep photos and up to date news. What else can you ask for? They even have reservations if you needed her service. Believe me, its really AWESOME.

Thursday, 26 July 2007

It's Your Birthday

Well, this post is definitely dedicated to Ng Siew Wui of Bukit Beruntung. Today is your actual birthday. So you are officially legal to do everything except retired. Which is okay also when you find yourself a blardy rich husband to marry to. Then I bet you can just retire for the rest of your life.

So for the meantime, stay forever *ahem* cute (nah you are always cute) and continue to carry the throne of Permaisuri Yongsuirina. (A name she carried for quite sometime)

This post will be your second present after the Roxy cap me and Jeffrey bought you. Why do you look disgusted?

Hope you like it. But wear it nicely la...

Lastly, HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY, NG SIEW WUI. And thanks for the scrumptious dinner party you threw the other day, the hokkien mee is fantastic that I skipped my diet quota. Lolz

Wednesday, 25 July 2007

Negara-kuku 2 (Updated)

At last someone did found the translation for our new national anthem. Hail KEN HAN!!! Haha.


Translation: Nicole Foo (with my edit-actually only edited one phrase)

Intro credits:
2007 Visit Malaysia Year Theme Song
I Love My Country

(Repeat) Check it out, yo, yo, yo.

(Repeat) Negaraku, Negarakuku.

I love my country, only when you have a country you have a home
Only with a home then there will be me, standing here with you
Loudly singing, don’t be afraid
Even though I curse all the time
My song, is just like the durian
Tough and spiky, only
To see if you dare to open it, to look at the truth inside
It can be very stinky, it can be very fragrant
It only depends on what kind of nostrils you have.

Our police is called Mata
Because they have very shiny eyes
Once it’s New Year, they will be very hard working
Holding pens but they will rarely write you a receipt
Because they are thirsty, they need to drink tea
Also kopi-O, want to add sugar?
If they add sugar, their mouths will sweetly smile at you
When you are leaving
They will even go “Tata.”

Tanah tumpahnya darahku
Rakyat hidup bersatu dan maju.

This phenomenon, doesn’t need any improvements
Neither does it need strengthening, the police and the people work together
A cup of coffee keeps our relationship temperate
I so very suka
At least I won’t go home and receive a saman (fine or ticket)
My dad would sure be pissed
I would also kiong kan (swear word in Cantonese for “get raped”), with no car to drive
What to do, this time so very kao lat (an expression, something like aiyo)
With no car, how do I go out and play?
With no car, how do I wage “wild war”? (It means have sex late at night in a quiet place)
With no car, how do I go and watch ah kua? (transvestites)
This country, I like it very much.

5 in the morning
There’s even a morning call to wake me up
Sometimes a few of them will sing together
When you listen to it, it’s like a love duet
The voice ululates like an R&B song
Even though sometimes they sing until it’s out of tune
Even though sometimes they even sing until their voices break
Some sound like cockerels, but they wake up earlier than them
This way we can know the time to get ready for class and for work
Don’t blame, the government only takes cares of the natives
Don’t blame, we don’t receive equal care
Only this way we can prove that we Chinese are not afraid of hard work
Only this way we can train ourselves to find a solution during hard times
Don’t feel weird about their standards
Because this only shows that we are smart (or capable)
Children who are not spoilt will not be dependant
Because you see some children are still not weaned off breast-feeding.

Rahmat bahagia
Tuhan kurniakan
Raja kita
Selamat bertakhta.

People who hide in government departments are even better (even more capable)
They can do everything so slowly
Even when people are queuing, are cursing stinky lelai (what’s that?)
They’re chill and unfazed
Sometimes they even bring out their kuih
They eat their nyonya kuih
More people will continue queuing up
Even when you curse stinky lelai it doesn’t matter
Because the guard at the side is dreaming
And he won’t scold you one lah.

They wrap up their heads; walk slowly and cross the road slowly
When you pass in the car you even have to let them pass first
The most important thing is to live happily; the most important thing is to live comfortably
Don’t be like the Chinese
Busy the whole day, very tough
We really cannot NOT admire this spirit”
Because this is their attitude in life.

(Attitude, attitude)

I’ve been saying good things in this song
I believe those of you who are pissed at me will like this now
The world is peaceful, and full of hope
No one is hurt, there aren’t any riots
You’re so classy, you’re so elegant
Your shit is fragrant, and you don’t curse
You guys are the most high class, every day it’s just romancing

Listening to Guang Liang Pin Guan (this local Chinese artiste)
But he already ran to Taiwan
Private school students graduate
It’s so very tough to get admitted into local universities
Actually we don’t have to get pissed about this issue
Actually this is the a very noble plan by the government
They want us to explore the world, to find new opportunities for ourselves
To learn things and come back and repay the country
This is plan is so great, I can’t quibble about it
All over the world you can see Malaysia’s children
They’re like refugees, so very shiok (expression for orgasm or high)

2007, Malaysia’s having Visit Malaysia Year
The Chinese culture is brought out and paraded
The government doesn’t even care about private school students
The certificate is thrown into the longkang (ditch), just like me

Graduated and went to Taiwan
Learned about things, and got ready to come back to repay my country
I stood on the streets of Taipei with my guitar
But my mouth still sings.

Rahmat Bahagia
Tuhan kurniakan
Raja kita Selamat bertakhta.

Well, enjoy guys while I myself analyse the lyrics. And do revisit the previous Negarakuku post.

Monday, 23 July 2007


Just finish watching the Prime Time news. Yet another blogger from Malaysia Today get sued. So after the last post on the Muar Rapper. I think I shall not blog much about the controversial stuff bout my own country. But don't worry, other country is okay. Lolz.

So to mend the damage I've done. This is the commercial on our Visit Malaysia Year 2007. "Enjoy".

Saturday, 21 July 2007


Today when I was driving, I came across this news about this popular Chinese Muar Rapper on Youtube being sue for disgracing the country on the radio. He created a music video clip using the national anthem, Negaraku. Frankly speaking, it's much more convincing and looks better than our Visit Malaysia Year Promo Commercials. I know its kinda racist and harmful. But it is the truth. So watch it and tell me what do you think?

And this are his older clips about Malaysia as well. Gotta say its a good arrangement for our national anthem. Maybe it should be use for our 50th National Day.

Gotta say it is damn funny. Those than having a hard time to understand Mandarin. Try to find someone to translate it for you. This is the second part of it.

And for you guys, this is the transcript from Mr. Brown.


Let me say this first
That I wrote this song just for fun
Don't get pissed off if you wanna listen to it

I'm a Hainanese boy
I speak six languages
Don't say that we Hainanese
Only know how to cook chicken rice !
Our coffee is so good, after downing a cup
I can even sing !

This song, I sing for all my friends
This song, I sing for all my friends
This song, I sing for all my friends

Friends in KL, let me tell you
Don't be too arrogant
What I'm saying now is straight from the heart

I learned Cantonese
Not because I'm submitting to you
But just to communicate
We are not morons
Malaysian Chinese
Are mostly Hokkien folk
But strangely, Cantonese dominates everything !
I don't normally give a f*** about these weird things
But why don't they use Mandarin on TV and radio ?

There are many kinds of Chinese
This is not Hong Kong !
Why is everything in Cantonese ?
Don't you have any respect ?
I'm learning it slowly
That is called "class"
I'm adapting to it slowly
Cos I know what's right

If it's too tough on you to listen to me
It's okay
Let me give you a phrase in Teochew :
F*** Your Mother

Na na na na ... ...

Singapore, became independent in 1965
But after independence
There were many problems
We speak the same languages
Even the same vulgarities
But when your Gahmen gives an order
You can't do anything about it !

My impression of Singapore
Is Uniformity
Cos your buildings
All look the same
This kind of planning
Is downright communist
Lee Kuan Yew and Mao Zedong
Are in fact buddies !

Weighs heavily on your shoulders
National development
Triumphed over development of independent thought
You guys are too kiasi
And too kiasu
Your kids have their paths laid out nicely by the Gahmen
When they come to Malaysia
They think it's so ulu !
Aiyah, even if we live in trees
We take elevators up our trees !

You walk on broad roads
And avoid small alleys
You even have to come to our country
To spit out your chewing gum !

Little boy - I think you don't even know how to cross roads
There are few zebra crossings here
But we know how to cope !

Na na na na ... ...

OK, it's the Bumis' turn now ...

Say that shit again :
"Chinese Go Back To China !"
If we all do go back
This ain't Malaysia no more
I worry about how you'll find jobs
But, hey that's okay !
Cos Bumis don't like to work !

All of you can go back into the jungle
And live like the aboriginals
Even if you want to goof off and strum guitars
There'll be no shops to sell them to you !
Even if you want to be Mat Rempit (motocycle gangs)
There'll be no bikes for sale !
And one less public holiday for you
Chinese New Year !

Stop bitching already
Kids - Open up your minds
This country does not depend on one race alone
"Chinese Pig" ?
Stop saying shit like that lah
But to be frank
Bak kut teh is actually quite nice !

My Bahasa is bad as shit
But this is truly how I feel
50 years have passed already
Stop sleeping all the time !
Look ahead lah
It's gonna be 2020 soon !

Na na na na ... ...

We are friends
But we are making mistakes
Cos if I don't understand you
You don't understand me
We are friends
But we are making mistakes
If we solve this problem
Everything will be free


After listening to all this and reading the news about him going to be sue, really wonders me where is the freedom of speech. But I bet if this is in Singapore, he will be in jail by now. Many bloggers and vloggers are placed behind bars for posting sensitive issues. So am I one of them? Don't sue me, I have no money.

Friday, 20 July 2007

It's A Pleasant Smell After All

Been going out everyday this whole week. Hardly sleep more than 5 hours everyday, that's why not much update on the blog. Did went gym today for like 30 minutes, because woke up late and promised my friends to be in school by 2pm. Well I'm early and most of them are late. It's a Methodites traditions.

The new block is building in a fast pace. So fast second floor already. This is what you will get for paying 1.1 million for each block.

Then Kevin went to the toilet and we saw this. Not his p**** la. This sign outside the toilet. WTF? Bilik Haruman Lelaki? What is so harum about the toilet? You go into the toilet to mengharumkan yourself? At least the smell of the toilet is much more pleasant now compare to the old days. But it is still not harum.

We've been wandering around, having canteen food and all. How miss the old days? But some of them really have grown up. All busy doing big business with their handphones ringing every five seconds.

Then we came across of the picture of this f***er, oops I mean Richard. What a poser? Well he didn't change all these years. Still so cute. NOT!!! Well he is good. No offence, just for entertainment.

Then we went down to Petaling Street for Beef Organs Noodles. Yeap, food again. Zhi Wei no longer knows the meaning of full anymore since he is trying to gain weight. But too bad its closed, so we have to settle with Wantan Noodles and Air Mata Kucing aka Longan Water.

On the way saw a fire. The fruit stall is on fire. We wanted to call the Bomba. But after seeing how cool is the lady selling the fruits there, we just don't care. The most we will have roasted fruit on the way back.

From day it turns night and from Petaling Street we switch over to Petaling Jaya. Its actually at the two far end of the of the world. But we are willing to travel for food. So we endure high speed highways, jammed street, freaking long traffic lights waiting and endless conversation. We reached SS2 Murni.

Most of them ordered the best food available there. Yet our Richard sticks to his Carrot Susu and western food. Did I mention that Richard counts out in Cantonese to figure out the price of the Wantan Me. He is like... huh? mm kau chat (RM5.70)?... yat yi sam sei mm...oh five and yat yi sam sei mm look chat...oh five seventy.

That's all for now. Freaking tired. And this is Ken Han's version about today. And if you guys have time while waiting for my next post, read this. IS FREAKING FUNNY. I fell from my chair just now.

Friday, 13 July 2007


Who is the largest copycats in Asia? Definitely Malaysia and Singapore. Well both of them are overgrown cats that turn into a tiger and a lion. Wanna know why I say so? Read on.

Still remember than Malaysia just build a ferris wheel call Eye On Malaysia? Well Singapore come out with a better one. The Singapore Flyer. Honestly both of them are lame. Just because London and Taiwan and many other country have one, doesn't mean you have to build one too.

Even the logo of the two ferris wheel look almost the same.
Fun Fact 1 : Singapore Flyer is the largest ferris wheel in the world in the measurement of its
Fun Fact 2: Eye on Malaysia is the largest PORTABLE ferris wheel in the world. Its like telling
Singapore, yeah we can move ours, can yours?

Not only that, Singapore have this reverse bungy thingy in Clark Quay call G Max. Guess what? Malaysia have the same? Its in KL Tower and its call G-Force X.

Both of them originated from New Zealand. But its from different company.

Even development projects is a competition. Singapore come out with its amazing Marina Bay. With the most expensive casino, a rain forest, expensive office building, floating stadium and lotsa expensive building. And jeng jeng jeng Malaysia got Iskandar Development Region, with Danga Bay in it and also other commercial area.

But all this new constructions and building which cost billions of dollars should also be complimented with million dollars of maintenance. Or else after a few years it will just goes in to the drain. Really gotta say, Malaysian tends to build impressive stuff but does not have the initiative to maintain it. Do you know that the ugly construction site next to Puduraya, the Plaza Rakyat, is suppose to be the second tallest building in Malaysia and the 7th in the world? But what you can see now is only a place for beggars and mosquitoes to breed.

Even the MAS building is plan to be build into an impressive building. But not only its not done, the MAS building is sold out i think last year due to the fact that MAS is not earning any money. But how can that be possible?

So this will be my very last post about Singapore for now. There's plenty more to say about that neighbouring county but it will leave it to all the yum cha session. Or else I will have nothing much to talk about.

Thursday, 12 July 2007

Shopping in a Hospital and NUS

The hospital my sister working in is really nice. Tan Tock Seng Hospital is not your normal hospital.Its so cool it have retail shops in it and shops like Starbucks. And my sister have discount there as staff.

The best thing is that it is link to Novena Square, a large shopping centre. Its even handicap friendly. So you might just see a man in his death bed in Novena Square doing some last minute shopping.

Novena Square is like any other mall in Singapore. Its has a California Fitness Center as well. So Jeffrey, interested? Chicks there are awesome as well.

On that day, there's the event of shaving head bald for charity. There's about 500 participant. And even some of them are chicks. Awesome. That is before the shave bald. But its for a good course, even head worth S$2000. By who I have no idea.

Then I went for lunch at this one of a kind fast food restaurant. Where you cook your own food with the instructions given.

From there I head to NUS. That place was freaking big that I lost in it.

Failed to find the school for architecture.

But this will be the dream place for Mr. and Mrs. Tan in the future.

On the last night in Singapore, I went to the Changi Airport. You all must be wondering what the hell I'm doing there? I also dunno.

From Terminal 2 I took a train to Terminal 1 which have a better viewing deck.

And then there's this large globe which made out of coins of different country donated by the visitor there.

That's the last place I'd been before I board this luxurious bus the next day. This bus is almost like the sit you can get in MAS. Of course it comes with a more expensive price of S$20. I was managed to catch all the movies I missed during exams. So good I almost forgot to tell the driver I was suppose to get down somewhere and not in Puduraya.

Read on people.

Muzium Negara Singapura

Its true that its a colonial building that have a Malay Language sign outside of it. Its kinda a rare sign in Singapore. The architecture is marvelous and once again Singapore is freaking rich. Come on, its just a museum. The National Museum Of Singapore.

At least the staff working there is friendly enough. So friendly that I manage to get a student price of S$5 eventhough I didn't bring my student pass. Hopefully she dun get caught soon enough for disloyalty to the country.

The place freaking nice, they even have a gadget strap on you and it will automatically brief you as you walk along. Good thing for lazy reader like me.

This rubber duck is on display just because of the fact that it wont 1 million dollar in the duck race.

There's plenty of stuff there. All kinda interesting but not all are allowed to be photograph. But this funeral cart is an exception. Wonder what the hell is it placed in a museum. Maybe someone did use it before this.

Then to those who have interest on smoking, why don't try opium? There's all the old canister for opium on display.

They even have the chair for it. How cosy.

This is a life size model of a Chinese street. Kinda unfair to the fact that very little about Malaysia is mention in the museum and it's all revolves around the Chinese only. What to do, Chinese are majority in Singapore.

The display on revolution of product is kinda funny. Do believe that this TV is produced in the 70's?

Even the toilet of the museum is freaking awesome. Its equivalent to the one u can get by paying RM2 in KLCC. But one thing that get me irritated is that the toilet taps in Singapore is all worked by sensor which i normally can't get it to work. Just be cheap and get the normal taps.

They have long mirror which tempted me to do this. But the best thing about Singapore's toilet is you can drink the water from the tap. Well its Newater. I did fill my tumbler up plenty of times there. Try doing that here in Kuala Lumpur.

The best thing is there's a bar and a restaurant in the museum. And Zhi Wei, you are right people nowadays are addicted to Muse.

Along the journey between the museum I'd been to, I saw plenty of interesting things. One of it is the Cineleisure. Its an old cinema building but now renovated and combined with a high tech shopping mall.

There's all the cool building used by the British which is now the court house.

This bridge still not opens to cattle and horses?

And what the hell is that? A UFO on top of a building? Its a government department building if I'm not mistaken. You can see it in this funny clip We Live in Singapura.

The Fullerton Hotel. Hopefully I will stay here the next time I go Singapore.

Random pictures of the jungle of sky scrapers there. But I do prefer the one we have in Kuala Lumpur.

I'd also even been to Penang. How nice? Its just next to Orchard Road.

Next on the post will be my visit to Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH) and National University of Singapore (NUS)
My very alive... please bear with me for a little while... I swear I will be back!